Everyone has them. A person at work that never seems to see the situation the way you do. They rub you the wrong way. Interactions with them are a challenge.

Yet, there isn’t an option to avoid them. You may be on a team or project together. They may be your client or customer. So, what do you do?

My Perspective

Having worked with a variety of frustrating co-workers over the years, I’ve had a chance to try many different approaches. There are several approaches that helped the situation.  What I realized is that the successful techniques focused on me, not the other person. Below are five steps to consider.

  1. Understand Your Frustration – Get to the bottom of why the person frustrates you is the first step. Are they always late? Are they disrespectful? Do they dismiss your ideas? Get to the bottom of the challenge before trying to work on the relationship.
  2. Voice Your Concerns – Once you know why you are frustrated, a good step is to have a conversation. I know we tend to avoid tough conversations.  However, the other person may have no idea that you are frustrated. A conversation could be a quick solution to remove this workplace challenge.
  3. Explore Your Differences – Consider the situations where you are frustrated through the lens of the other person.  What might they see or feel that is different from you? If you have taken an assessment like CliftonStrengths, you could explore if your strengths might be colliding causing issues in communication.
  4. Change Your Approach – We don’t have the power to change others, but we can change ourselves. Consider if there are things you can do to manage the challenging partnership.  For example, if they are always late to meetings, plan a topic they don’t need to be a part of to be discussed before they arrive.
  5. Manage Your Emotions – Sometimes a frustrating coworker can put us in a bad mood and the relationship drives our mind to ruminate on the situation. We all have agency over our thoughts. Do your best to shift your mind away from the person and focus on positive aspects of the work.

I don’t want to imply that trying the five ideas above will solve all problems.

Frustrating coworkers are tough, and you will need to remind yourself often of the strategies to resolve.

The best situation is when you can have open and honest conversations with the person and have regular conversations to make the relationship as positive as it can be.

Your Turn

Do you have a coworker who you are frequently frustrated with?

What have you done to make the situation better?

Have you tried any of these ideas?  If so, how did they work?

Are there other strategies you use when encountering a challenging person at work?