In late May, Seth Godin had a blog post titled “Stevie and Marvin”.
The lesson of the post was that Mavin Gaye’s charisma “was a skill and not something he was born with”.
This was an interesting statement to me.
I always felt that charisma was something some people were born with, and others were not.
This made me want to dive in and learn more.
There are a LOT of articles on how to build the skill of charisma.
My Perspective
As I read the articles, I saw some themes emerging and the categories below create my summary for how to learn to be more charismatic.
Be Expressive: Your visual cues are the first thing others will notice about you. Ensure you show expression by smiling, looking people in the eyes, and using body language when communicating. In presentation settings, do your best to manage your nerves and pace your words as this will also contribute to your level of charisma.
Be Attentive: This involves both listening and being focused on EVERYONE you engage with. Listen more than you talk and practice reading the emotions of others. Ask clarifying questions and do your best to remember the details you learn. Ensure your interest is genuine and be respectful by not being on your phone or computer while engaging in conversation.
Be Generous: Do not act self-important and instead shine the spotlight on others. The most charismatic individuals are very giving and don’t focus on what they might receive in return. Root for the success of others and avoid getting caught up in gossip of any kind.
Be Real: Charismatic individuals share their stories and anecdotes. They aren’t afraid of being vulnerable and admitting their failings. Be humble and own you oddities.
Be Magnetic: Overall, charisma is about connection. We all want to associate with happy, enthusiastic people. Choose your attitude and words carefully. Use words people can relate to, look for shared experiences, set high goals and have the confidence to achieve them.
Your Turn
Did you know that charisma is a skill?
Is this a skill you want to nurture?
Which of the five areas above do you need to focus on most to be more charismatic?